BRUCE
'S STORY





A Dad's Perspective
 
It’s said that few things matter more than family.  Problem was, a “family” of our own was sorely missing.  How that came to be is a mystery of sorts, but it happened just the same.  Before my wife and I realized that we hadn’t begun planning a family, we were in our late thirties and the clock was ticking. 

One little problem… the hands of time had bypassed that glorious window of opportunity that for others is like an endless stroll along a mountain trail.  For us, that window was more like a sprint in the rain from the car to the coffee shop.  What had happened?  Where did the time go?

Feeling confused, betrayed, yet determined, we forged ahead with the “normal” steps couples take when they’ve seemingly reached the end of their God-given rope.  After a natural miscarriage and countless failed IVF cycles, all we had to show for our dreams were tears of pain and frustration.  How could it be that a family for us was not in the cards?  That was a question we both pondered night and day and to which an answer we really didn’t want to accept.  So, we didn’t.  I should say that my wife didn’t. 

By shear luck, fate, or divine intervention -- whatever you want to call it – my wife stumbled upon Glenda and Scott Lyons, another couple who had taken that same sprint in the rain as we did but instead of pain, found success in IVF and were blessed with three beautiful children. 

But, their hearts were unsettled. 

Most people who go through what the Lyons’ went through move on with their lives and begin focusing on raising a family.  Others, like the Lyons’, wanted to share the gift that had been bestowed upon them in a way that would hopefully give another couple like us the same joy of perhaps raising their own family.

Miraculously, my wife Sue and Glenda Lyons met online.  A curious post to an IVF board.  A reply.  Many replies by many couples.  A ray of hope.  Wait.  Don’t get your hopes up too much.  We’re only one of many. 

Days pass... 

Sue and Glenda begin to sow the seeds of a relationship.  The list is shortened.  Until.  Finally, the Lyons’ chose us as the recipients of their remaining embryos, the byproducts of an IFV procedure that resulted in their beautiful set of twins, Samantha and Mitchell.

Amazingly, we’ve found another couple who has agreed to graciously and lovingly give us the “missing ingredient” we need to hopefully have a successful pregnancy.  But, would it work?  Once again, the excitement of the thought!  The dream of taking my son out in my canoe for the first time.  And of taking my daughter to lunch and then shopping to buy her whatever her little heart desired – a lifetime affliction I was so willing to endure if all of this proved successful. 

Hopes, they’re an elusive thing. 

I’m not sure I ever wanted anything so badly as for this to work.  But, we had been disappointed so many times before.  Another failed IVF would permanently break my wife’s already wounded heart.  And that was something I wasn’t sure I could bear.

Down the path of medical and legal paperwork we go.  Finally, “the” day arrives.  Tense.  Scared.  Hoping.  Praying.  Then…. The wait.

Well, I think you know by now how it all worked out:  our family is now complete.  My wife gave birth to healthy boy/girl twins.  The sweetest, most perfect living things I have ever laid my eyes on.  After alerting our immediate family, I drove home and emailed the Lyons’ with the good news and to say “thanks” in words that probably were totally inadequate, given the weight of what just happened.

You see, from all of this, we got a gift of life in the form of our twins.   But, we also got the gift of an extended family in the Lyons’.  Perhaps some of you might not want to have that kind of relationship with your donor(s).  We choose to.  Do what your heart tells you to do. 

But, for us, that relationship has been the second awesome product out of all that we’ve been through.  And, our twins will now have the gift of knowing that they have this extended family out there that they can call on when they want or need to.  We not only gained our little family.  We gained a larger, loving family that will be there for each other in this journey of life going forward.   Peace be with you and good luck in your journey.
 


About embryo donation stories: This story and the other stories you will find at the Miracles Waiting website are contributed by the authors, and we do not verify the details or content for accuracy. They are offered on this site for informational and entertainment purposes only. They are not a substitute for medical or legal consultation.

The Miracles Waiting, Inc. Team